Confidence – fake it till you make it!

Guest blog post  from our Inspiration Guru Susan Odev - writer, trainer, performer & co-author of Mum Ultrapreneur

On June 8^th 2010 I was the guest speaker at the Bedford Mum’s the Boss meeting. It was an early start. I was up at 5.00am to catch the high speed link from the next main town in to St.Pancras and then onwards. Helen met me at the station and soon we were chatting about life, business and cake like old pals. And the rest of the day was like an old school reunion. Meeting faces I vaguely knew, not from distant school years, but instead from tiny Twitter profiles.

(Have to give a shout out here to @HumbersHomemade, @HelenLindop,  @amyaccountant, @thekidscoach, @wisegenius, @sarahchapman1 and of course @MumsTheBoss).

What would they make of me? Would they enjoy my speech? Would they “unfollow” en masse?

Hopefully they seemed to warm to my homespun style. They even took onboard my bizarre tastes in men and music.

Sam introduced me as a SuperStar! That was certainly not how I felt. I just happen to be a mum: who has struggled with self-employment, four kids and a head full of trivia and song lyrics to realise all this in a book. Yes the book was top five on Amazon across three different categories and it was standing room only at my workshop last year at the Mumpreneur conference – but believe me when I say that’s not as impressive as it sounds!

For me the best thing to come out of the adventure of writing Mum Ultrapreneur has been the incredible business mums I have met in the process. Either when I was interviewing last year, or talking about it at events like Mum’s The Boss since. Some of these mums have been uber successful; most have just got by. But the one thing they all share is an awe-inspiring “just do it!” attitude that, if bottled, could solve world poverty and bring universal peace.

And that is what we are all doing, in our own little ways, every day. With every decision to find a more ethical way to trade, or a more human way to serve, we create a better world. With every school play attended and bruised knee kissed better we are preparing a stronger, more loving generation. In our own little ways we are trail-blazers crying out for family, self-fulfillment  and homemade cakes!

I stand before you as a flawed, middle-aged, overweight mother of four who has done some crazy things (haven’t we all). But I am “working” the “SuperStar” status and loving it!

During my talk I mentioned how when I went along to my first networking lunch I was terrified and stony broke. The meal plus travel and a new pair of tights (without holes in the toes) cost me about  £80. That might not sound much to some of you but to me it was uneasily stolen from the children’s food budget for that week and came packing huge levels of guilt. But I just “knew”  I had to go and look the part as best I could.

At that meeting I met Sarah Tremellen, the guest speaker and founder of Bravissimo and the first business mum to agree to be interviewed for my little book.

No one there knew my financial situation. No one knew how nervous and out of my depth I was. No one there knew, including myself, just how life changing that lunch would be.

If your heart is telling you something is right – do it!

If you head is telling you you can’t – tell it to shut up!

And if you think that that successful business mum is not you – then who is she?

Become her!

Ask how would she act right now?

Would she go to a networking events with holes in her tights? NO!

Would she introduce herself as a Nobody? NO!

Would she worry about spending £80 on a business opportunity of a lifetime? NO!

And when that little voice creeps up and says “that’s all well and good for her – but she’s not me!” – remember she has the same little voice in her head. We all do. And maybe, just maybe, she gets over her fears by pretending that she’s you!